Wednesday, August 11

Bush's New 9/11 Commercial


Script for "Solemn Duty"


President Bush:
I'm George W. Bush and I approve this message.

Voice Over:
My most solemn duty is to lead our nation to protect ourselves. I can't imagine the great agony of a mom or a dad having to make the decision about which child to pick up first on September the 11th. We cannot hesitate, we cannot yield, we must do everything in our power to bring an enemy to justice before they hurt us again.
The Kerry-Edwards campaign has categorically - and thoroughly - taken apart this moment of faux heartwarmth by the Kneejerk War Boy.

Our simpler reaction: I'm confused by the "which child to pick up" line, but he had about thirty of 'em in front of him on 9/11 and he froze like a popsicle for seven minutes while they read "My Pet Goat" to him. We already do know how he'd handle that great agony.

And you DID have it in your power to bring the real enemy to justice. You just chose to bribe Afghan locals to infiltrate Tora Bora (who were in turn bribed by bin Laden to stay away) while you were plotting to send our troops to Iraq. Nice work.

Another product "As Seen On TV" that we don't want.