Dicky Went A-Hunting

I-84, Rte 9 and the Beacon-Newburgh bridge are all closed because...Dick Cheney went hunting. Yes, Vice President Snarkylips is hunting wabbit in Poughkeepsie, NY. This transcript of a frantic phone call from the scene, from the studios of Jack-FM:

LizzzKing: Bob... I-84 is shut down... BNR bridge... Rte 9... everything
LizzzKing: DICK CHENEY WENT HUNTING.
JackFMRadio: what?
JackFMRadio: oh no
JackFMRadio: Must be rabbit season...no duck season...no rabbit season...no duck...
JackFMRadio: where's FA when America needs him?
LizzzKing: OHHHHHH... the tape will be a collectors' item... trust me
JackFMRadio: did he take the accounting people who discovered Halliburton was ripping off the Pentagon?
LizzzKing: This really pissed off the entire region... you have NO IDEA
LizzzKing: E-mail Hoffmania

So it was done. So it was told.